Big Fat Deal: $9 Million to Restore Your Equilibrium

BCLiving takes you inside one of the most outrageously upmarket real estate offerings in the province

Address: 1409 West 38th Avenue, Vancouver

Price: $8,680,000

Listing: R2311567

The skinny: Six-bedroom, seven-bathroom, 5,779-square-foot house on a 8,941-square-foot lot in Shaughnessy

The bling: It’s a stressful time, we know. No matter how much help the great unwashed are given, just like Billy Idol’s favourite rebel, they cry “more, more, more.” But what they don’t realize is that with privilege comes power, and with power comes the pressure to never give an inch, to just hold onto what you’ve got. And when you’ve got a whole heap of a lot, holding on is so very hard to do. So hard, in fact, that you need a refuge: a place of clean lines and no colour. Whiteness, after all, is so healing, so restorative. Here, then, is just what you’ve been looking for: an oasis of purity, a place where you know you can close your front door and breathe nothing but your own hot air.

The hidden extras: Everything you need to never have to mix and mingle with the little people again: sauna, hot tub, home theatre, wine cellar, exercise room, laneway house (for the servants), and an elevator (because eventually even your millions will no longer be able to halt the ravages of age).